I am stuck!

Three blog posts in a day?
+gasp+ :O
I have been home all day with nothing to do, to be fair.
The flu virus has managed to find me again.
I wonder why it likes me so much?
My immune system betrays me all the time.

I have been watching movies, taking meds, sleeping, eating.
It didn't rain all day which has me P.O'd a little bit because I wanted to hit the streets to get some shopping done.
I alsooooo want a new haircut.
Actually, I want my old haircut back. Hmm.
So that's going to happen sometime this week I suppose.

It's going to be July tomorrow :)
It sucks that I am sick though :/
I hope to magically feel better in the morning.
I don't want to spend another day at home :/

K asked me to make a list of things I wanted to shop for.
I am not sure if she meant it seriously, but I did it anyway.

• T-shirts for college.
• Checkered full length pants.
• Stockings, coloured ones.
• Candy coloured nail paints.
• A dress.

If you happen to know the exact places where I could find any of these, please tell me :) Otherwise I am going to hit most places in town anyway.

Another thing!
I was in the BMM office yesterday,
& I overheard Manjula ma'am say that we might be going to Chandigarh and Shimla for our I.V. !!!!!!
Is that amazing, or what?
I was hoping we'd go to Himachal all this while, wheeeee!
And Chandigarh is obviously going to be great :)
.. during the winter that too!
I hope it works out :)
Three more months though, I can't wait.
But there's plenty to look forward to and do in these months anyway.
I'll be there before I know it.

Alright, gonna go watch Scoop now.
Later! x

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

We are meant for each other and not meant for each other. It's a contradiction.

I have never had a favourite director before, but off late, I have started to grow fond of Woody Allen and his neurotic, eccentric and absolutely honest way of making movies. And it's not just the direction part, the screenplay, the script (especially the dialogues) are so unique! His character of Dobel, in Anything Else was especially endearing. I wonder at times, whether the character was purely fictional or if it has pieces of him from his real life. I'd imagine Woody Allen to be somewhat like Dobel in real life :)

And what makes me talk about him right now? I only finished watching one of his movies - Vicky Cristina Barcelona. It was very interesting. There's contradiction, both sides of a subject are emphasized upon in this movie (regardless of what the subject really is). For example, Cristina (Scarlett Johansson) is this girl who never knows what she's looking for, she only knows what she isn't looking for - "the conventional, cookie cutter mould, the expected". Doug on the other hand, goes on to call this attitude of contempt for normal values as "pretentious and a boring cliché." One person's courage could be another person's recklessness.

Then there's always this underlying form of mockery. Like Jerry's (Anything Else) situation at the start of the movie and through it with the various people that tie him down is quite amusing. Even Vicky's (Cristina Vicky Barcelona) courageous leap to challenge the status quo and how poorly it turns out is pretty funny.

He's witty and you'll never know what to expect at the end of his movies. I have noticed this in all three movies that I watched. He always surprises you. For example, in CVB, Cristina's reaction to Maria and Juan's relationship or also how things eventually turn out in the end of the movie, for both Cristina and Vicky.

Another example would be how Chris Wilters (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) manages that narrow escape. And who could forget the quote that follows.

The man who said "I'd rather be lucky than good" saw deeply into life. People are afraid to face how great a part of life is dependent on luck. It's scary to think so much is out of one's control. There are moments in a match when the ball hits the top of the net, and for a split second, it can either go forward or fall back. With a little luck, it goes forward, and you win. Or maybe it doesn't, and you lose.

Anything Else is quite similar too, but I have already talked about that a lot! :P

Next up on my Woody Allen list:

• Cassandra's Dream
• Melinda and Melinda
• Scoop
  

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

You..

I still dream about him. Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
I should be able to deal with it by now. It's been too long to not
Even though I don't ever accept it, the fact still remains that I miss him. And I miss him plenty, at that.
But there's nothing that can be done, so I should just make up mind and get over it.
Easier said than done isn't it?

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

I am liking this. <3

Thank goodness it wasn't a boring Sunday!
I despise Sundays because after a full week, all of a sudden I have nothing to do (and it drives me mad!)
Believe it or not, I am glad we already have a project to work on.
.. gives me something to do.
And it's going to be brilliant, because our topic is lush ♥

Btwwwwwwww, #tabooinmumbai is going to be sick =) Can't wait. Everyone's invited.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

Let's chase cars, around our heads.

You know, when in "Chasing Cars" he sings,

Those three words, are said too much, they are not enough.

I fiercely wish to be able to feel that, to mean that for someone. I miss being in love. I want to be able to open up to love, to not be afraid anymore.

----------------
Now playing: Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars
via FoxyTunes

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

Creative Writing

We had Creative Writing today.
.. saw Good Will Hunting.
I am glad it was a movie I hadn't watched before.
It made character analysis harder than it was for Silence of the Lambs. I like that challenge.

This is probably the first Matt Damon movie I have seen?
I think he's really good.
I want to see more of his movies, especially The Good Shepherd and The Departed.

I liked when we psychoanalyzed Will Hunting.
He's got abandonment issues, therefore he looks for negatives in any person who tries to get him to open up and abandons them before they can do it to him.

There's much more, but that's the point that appealed to me the most, that I can relate to.
It's incredible when you tear open and study every bit of this character, you come to see how perfectly the situations and his traits are intertwined & how much thought really goes into writing a story. It seems so difficult..

But that's beside the point, I wanted to recommend this movie. I liked it. A lot.

Aditya Kriplani is one of the better teachers we have had in KC so far. I only wish he was more open to accepting other people's perspectives. Meh, maybe with time.. But I enjoy his classes, maybe because it's such a great subject :)

Continue reading...

Soulmates

Is there one person for everyone?
Why just one?
What if s/he lives at the other end of the world?
What if s/he is 80 years old?
What if s/he dies tomorrow? Or is already dead?

Your soulmate is supposed to make you feel complete.
I can't for the life of me concede that I am incomplete and that too, not on my own accord BUT because of someone else.

How do you know someone is your soulmate?
Are they supposed to be an exact copy of you, your traits, likes, ambitions?
Won't that get really boring and predictable then?
Are they supposed to be the exact opposite of you?
Won't that get too conflicted and complicated then?

Finding 'the one' has been romanticized so much,
it's almost blasphemous to say that there are many people that may be the right person for you.
It doesn't necessarily mean you have to be with that many people.
But it shouldn't mean that you can't be with many people during the course of your life and not cherish every single one equally, either.

I don't believe in soulmates.
The idea is frustrating, because it leads to the possibility of never finding the one.
Which is neither fair or logical.. at all.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

:)

I just did Karishma's blog. Do you love it?
(Hint: correct answer is a three letter word starting with Y)

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

Where's my hangover?

Home alone after ages.
I slept for only three hours last night.
I am such a dork, you know?
I know I have to wake up at 5.30 AM but I still don't get my ass off the computer before 1 AM.
To top it all, I was pretty drunk last night.
And I wasn't even planning on it!
Poor K, didn't get as drunk as I was expecting! Hmph.
But well, yeah. I am pretty amazed by the fact that I woke up at 5.00 AM regardless.
AND, I was brave enough to go to class (because there was an assignment to submit).
That's not all .. I hadn't finished my assignment (started, hadn't even started it..)
So I get to college, finish the assignment, then also work on an assignment for R 'cos she didn't show up and submit them both. Hah!
Now that's a LOT of good work from someone who is supposed to be hungover.
I wish I wasn't such a geek sometimes =P

Anyway, like I said .. I have been home all day after college.
I slept (mostly), listened to some new music that I have managed to lay my hands on, logged back on neo (after a week!) and watched a movie.
Which movie? Lost in Translation.
Funny thing is, I didn't expect it to be this good.
I expected it to be a sappy love story.
Two people unhappy in their respective marriage. Except there's a twist.
What they have is not a sleazy love affair and a whole lot of drama later.
It's much more than that.
The whole story is amazing, really. I loved it.
And even though the real essence of the story is not expressed through dialogues, it translates so easily onscreen.
I shouldn't say more, I don't want to spoil it for those who haven't seen it.

Btw, I am now going to keep all the movies that I download.
So if you want to watch any of the movies that I mention from here on, get me a pen drive or something and I'll give it to you :)

That's ALL for now.
I might be back later today, I feel very post-y =P

P.S. It's awesome that Flock publishes my posts on Facebook directly now. No more importing, whee! ^_^

----------------
Now playing: Sugarcult - Pretty Girl (The Way)
via FoxyTunes

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

♥

This is going to sound really random and out of the blue but I really wanted to mention that I love my blog very much and I read back occasionally and I love to be able to relive every important day there has been in the last so many months.

I hope I never stop blogging, ever.

Continue reading...

Bloop !

I hate changing layouts. I can't fucking move away from the computer till I find one that suits my needs and idiosyncrasies perfectly. I can't sleep leaving my blog in a mess and I most definitely can't use a layout I have used before.

I am really fussy, no? :P

Anyway, I am feeling a little too happy today for reasons like rain, chicken, friends, walks, cigs, jokes and unexpected phone calls.

But geez, my sleep is fucked up. I can't get to bed before 2 AM! Sigh. Very weird. I am not a very *night* person. Thankfully I have no morning lectures tomorrow. I don't feel like going at all though :/ I want to go somewhere else. But I don't know whereeeeee! *yawn* I should crrrrash! Good night (:

Continue reading...

Disconnected

I never know how computer dependent I really am till it crashes.
And I positively detest staying at home without my machine :x
There are no movies to watch, no songs to listen to, no people to chat with, no blogs to read..
And I am forced to kill time watching TV (yuck!) ..
How I hate it =P
I can't read the whole day, even though my current muse is extremely interesting ;)
I realise I am not a fast reader, I like to take time with my book.
Harry Potter is the only book I have read at unimaginable speed =P

College is great, and now that it's started raining it's going to be kickass :D
I want to get out of town for a day, but I don't know where to go!!!! Or with whom!
Can I have a one-day boyfriend please? =P
No but seriously, I want to get out of town; it's just perfect timing.
& if things work out I just might go to Pune with K this week. Or to a farmhouse maybe :O

A few things are still bothering me, but I am trying to deal :)
I have been cheating on my diet a lot, but after I worked my ass off for the last four months, I should cut myself some slack ^_^
All of today has been pretty uneventful (read: no internet), but I liked the evening walk when it started raining without warning (w00t!)

I want it to be July already.
I am going to be so rich then, lol.
Not only that, there's going to freshers to rag, Polaris, grad party, freshers' party (hopefully) and a whole bunch of interesting movies to look forward to (sparing theose that Dev. D makes us watch in class!)
Talking about Dev. D .. he's well.. very weird to say the least.
Everything to him is "interesting" .. and he shows the most random movies ever (read: Criss Cross and Sleuths) .. I never get what he's on about :x
Creative Writing is brilliant (as expected!), but more on that later.

Well, anywaaaay.. I must get going because my brother is crowding the screen, GAH!
I miss my computer ;_;
I have so many unseen movies on there, sigh.
Ah well, then there's tomorrow.. (:

Continue reading...

SO, that was fun.

Today I:

went to college, sat through Culture Studies, pretended to listen but read Dostoyevsky instead.

eagerly waited to see what the fuss about the CW professor was, felt let down, interesting lecture nonetheless :D

went to Bandra in a train that was mind-fuckingly crowded

abused five auto-walas outside Bandra station 'cos they wouldn't take us where we wanted to go, laughed seeing R shout at them !

reached Firangi Paani but couldn't get in 'cos we didn't have age proof, bllllaaaaaaah!

walked up to Subway and ate Chicken Seekh Sub *yum*

could totally have another one! but didn't :x

started to walk aimlessly

saw two men doing drugs or black magic or some weird shit, K started staring into their things and then they started yelling at us, so we started to walk away really fast. One minute later,

E: Dude, they were totally doing drugs!
K: Were they? I thought they were doing black magic.
E: Yeah maybe. He said 'idhar kya dekh rahi hai', that's why you were running na?
K: What??? He said that?! I was running cos I saw a dog!
E: .....

ended up walking all the way to Carter's

K (sees a black dog): That dog is so scary!
(five minutes later, we walk like ten steps ahead and sit)
K: Listen, that dog is following us!

sat by the beach and laughed at the cheesy lines the couple sitting next to us were exchanging

went back to Linking Road and gave the bouncers at Firangi Paani some really nasty looks

took the dirtiest gali to Bandra station all by myself! I can't believe I came out alive o.o

got home, finished PR work in 15 minutes *gasp* =O

Continue reading...

The Afterthought

I am compelled to write a follow up to my last post.
I blew my lid off last night.
.. choosing to go to college somehow made things better.

In my deranged mood, I asked my friend, "What is the purpose of existence anyway?"
"To pursue happiness", he said.

And as much as I hate to admit, that one statement fixed it.
Because at the end of standing up for myself and my dreams, I am bound to be happy. And I will be.
Think about that :)

Continue reading...

em-effed

GAH!
I want to vent.
But I can't say these things here.
And saying it to another person won't help.
Cos it's my load to carry.
.. talking about it to a random person might make me feel alright for a bit, but it's not the same.
I don't even know what I am supposed to be confronting here.
>.<

I have started to feel cynical, pessimistic, negative all of a sudden.
I don't know what to do with this.
Was I happier with boundaries?
Is this the effect of opening up and letting people in.
Am I letting a stranger get with my brain?
What am I doing?

All of a sudden, the "aftermath" is making me question everything that I am and everything that I stand for.
WHY?!
Since when did it come to this.
I feel so fickle-minded.
During the course of writing this post, I have had three mood swings already.

At one point I feel like I am being ridiculous, over dramatic..
And at another I want to throw everything out of the window. Question the very basis of existence.
I am conflicted, confused.
WHY DO I NEED TO THINK SO MUCH?
About life, about people, about meaning, about purpose (& like a stupid pessimist too!)
Nineteen years olds are not supposed to think so much! x_x
Arrgh!

Why couldn't I just be like blonde or something?
Ignorance is supposed to be bliss, right? >.<
(I can't believe I said that, somebody slap me dramatically so I can revert to my senses!?)

P.S. I have deleted my Facebook account in the process. I need to stay off that thing.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

:/

Today, I have felt: lethargy, boredom, curiosity, slight enthusiasm, pointlessness, contentedness, infatuation, jealousy, dull, annoyed, confused, apathetic.

Sigh, very PMS :/

Continue reading...

Oh writers, where art thou?

Why aren't people blogging any more D:
The last time I read a blog entry was like over a week back and that too after such a long gap!
I don't want to find and follow a random person's blog.
Because admit it, it's not as fun.
So what is it? ;_;
Are people busy? lazy? out of ideas? writer's block?

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Continue reading...

Anything Else

I did it. I will stick by it. Whenever the negative or the morbid creeps in, I will take a deep breath, rationalize, sort myself and be fine :) This is the first time a movie helped me rearrange my life. Surprising.

I love firsts.

Continue reading...

Never trust a naked bus driver.

Jerry is a struggling comedy writer, with a messy life that holds him back from getting to something better. He has a good for nothing manager, a weirdly wired girlfriend and a shrink who as good as prolongs his agonizing situation. Jerry says he has problem leaving people; even when he knows it's the best thing to do, he can't leave people.. they have to leave him.

Enter Dobel.

You have to watch this movie, it's hilarious and it makes you think. It has led me to confront some of my own issues.

Continue reading...

Day 1. Year 2.

I have slept only two hours since yesterday.
I woke up at 5.00 AM. Got dressed. Left home.
Love the solitary rickshaw rides. Nothing but my music.
It's incredible how the first song you listen to can decide the mood for your WHOLE! day.

Thankfully our class isn't on the FIFTH floor. Boo-yah TYs! :-P
People have changed, K & I noticed. For the better of course :)
I don't know. It felt different somehow - class. I like it.

Oh, there was all this discussion about Blitzkrieg (that's our college fest, btw) .. I am excited about that.
I realize things will get /really/ hectic soon.
Heck, today was hectic. I got home in the evening :-P
I am not complaining though :)

Dinesh saw me smoking before class, but surprisingly he's chilled about it. !phew
Sudha is going to teach us Media Studies. I am not sure if I can take her agonizing attitude for the next six months, but it wasn't so painful today :-P

I managed to shop a little bit (whee!) ..
& I am finally armed against the rains (well, almost .. I need to find the perfect bright red umbrella!)
The rain is being a real bitch though. Even boys don't play so many mind games !!! Bleh.
It should just rain, then it would be perfect.

Continue reading...

:s

Weird day.
And I thought I was having trouble making decisions. Hmph.
Ah well, as of now. I am ditching plan A.
I am not sure why I keep doing this.
I can't stick to my decisions for very long.

I hate feelings, feelings confuse the crap out of me.
Why can't it just be 100% pure logic.
Step-by-step. Nice and simple.
But no!
Feelings get in the way and take you from "in your face easy" to "dramatic screw up" ..
Sigh.
I can say I don't want to think about it, but I have to own up and deal eventually.
And I don't know how I can do that if I can't make decisions.

What do I want. What do I want. What do I want.
Can someone decide for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Continue reading...

Things I have learnt this summer.

This is my last post under the label "summer" .. The last two months have been quite unexpected. I have managed to do a lot of exciting things but there are some things that I am not particularly proud of. I hope to have learnt a few things. I want to turn regret into experience.

• Do not get drunk too often or too fast.
• When in doubt , don't.
• Work on friendships, the real ones.
  
• Take public transport or walk as often as possible.
• No means no. Stick to it. A bad day, mood swings or sweet talk shouldn't change your mind. Draw a list of reasons and read them every time you're about to falter.
  
• A job is important. PLEASE get one.
• It can't be a 'spur of the moment' thing, it has to be more than that.
• If you set your mind to it, you can have it.
  

Continue reading...